Monthly Archives: August 2013

A Poem for ME..

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I was clearing my yahoo email inbox today. And I found something about which I had totally forgotten ( Okay, I’m lying. Never forgot about this particular thingy). This is a POEM written for me by someone from my past. This is something which sort of blew my mind when I read it for the first time. I felt on top of the world and couldn’t believe that someone could write such lovely niceties for someone like me. I had saved it in th “Drafts” as I treasured it.
But I see no point in holding on any longer. Thus, I feel no hesitation in sharing it with the world. These words mean nothing to me now as I have realised these are nothing but hollow words! Words which have been arranged to form a meaningful poetry but have no real meaning.. Words meant only to impress.. Words which came NOT from the core of the poet’s heart. Well, if this is what I think about this poem, then why don’t I just delete it and move on? End the case? Because,  no matter how hollow and meaningless it is. No matter how naive it is (and kind of funny in some some parts), it is something which was once very close to my heart. It is something which made me smile and feel extremely special once! 

I was having a little guilt feeling about sharing this, but it vanished when I reasoned with myself and thought – he probably must be writing such ( much better ones and not childish like this one) poems for someone else right now..

So here it is:
(Written in 2010)

“Days are stressful,taxing and hard,
and all my happy thoughts,
that I usually discard,
come to the fore,
at the onset of anything bore,
which distract and kill,
but provide a lot of thrill,
such a thrill has been you,
and people like this are really few,
every moment with you seems new,
like the beautiful sunrise,
and the morning dew.!

Whenever I access my facebook wall,
It’s you, to whom my mind gives a call,
problems,though many at times seem tall,
but when I feel your presence, they become really small.
Even thinking of you, brings a smile,
and this smile comes every while,
smooth and shiny,
like a bathroom tile.!
like when you see picturesque mountains,
stretching longer than a mile.

Every text i forward,
is always sent to you,
a reply is always anticipated,
which I always get, so I feel very obliged to you!

I christened you doe,
for your beautiful eyes,
and whatever you do, they always look nice!
Your long and dark hair,
always invite a stare,
your beauty is distinct,
your mind is wise,
wit,intelligence and inner strength,
also follow you like spies,
Your smile sets you apart,
especially when your lips part!.
I then get a glimpse of your pearly white,
which are equally attractive and  very bright.

Your voice shows smartness,
the inner you,
pretty hard for me then,
to not think of you.

The moments we shared,
though we never met,
have always been special,
and some even included a bet!

I remember each moment,
though I forgot almost every other thing,
each memory about you is fresh with me,
even if it had no zing.,
a plain greeting is equally remembered,
like some fan club of you,
to which I’ve been membered .

You in the blank saree,
made a stunning combination,
which has been stuck,
in my mind’s documentation,
If beauty is synonymous with looking good,
then you are a fairy,
who even eats food.

I feel very pained when I face the reality,
that you don’t wanna be mine,
and then I feel the gravity.
My heart doesn’t agree that  this can’t happen,
and thinks about you,
whenever it feels dampned,
the ink will run out,
your eyes may tire,
but my thoughts won’t stop,
as you are the only one I heartily admire.

Those minutes are few,
when I amn’t thinking of you,
cause true love is rare,
and does need a lot of care,
it never has any fare,
but all it mostly evokes, is a surprised stare.

I must end now,
cause I don’t wanna bore,
same silly things again,
which I think you do abhor,
I’ll never give up,
neither will I move on,
cause I remember you each moment,
from dusk till dawn…..”

I haven’t edited anything, just copy-pasted the entire thing here. Call me crazy but I don’t enjoy poems. Never have. Can’t figure out why people like poetry??

Introvertizing

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I remember describing myself as an extroverted, chirpy person till a few years back. But I don’t think I can use these adjectives for myself anymore. It’s unfathomable how our personalities change within such a short span.
I never imagined that someone like me could become such an introvert.
I used to love being in the company of lots and lots of people. I used to love sharing my so-called-secrets with multiple people. It’s weird how in a matter of just a couple of years I have changed so drastically!
I can’t particularly pin-point the reasons because of which this introvertization process happened.

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Yesterday, I was surrounded by 13-14 family members; still feeling ruefully lonely. There always is a persistent feeling that something’s missing… I wish I could figure out what’s missing! 
I feel like I’m loosing myself gradually… I am slowly turning into this morose, complicated person,  who others find hard to like.

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Dear Novels, I miss you!

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“Books are talking, Are you listening?”

I love reading novels. As millions and billions of people do. Though I’m not a voracious reader; the type of readers who finish reading two novels in a single day, or the type of readers who like reading books so much that it is the ONLY thing they want to do all the time. I just love reading. And yes, if a novel is gripping enough, reading it is what I want to do all throughout the day! If the novel is interesting enough, I tend to involve myself a little too much with it, I get highly engrossed in it and many a times all my thoughts are focused around and about the novel I’m reading. Many bookworms would relate with me, or so I guess! (and hope!).

My love for reading emerged when I was in 8th grade. When children of my age were running away from books that had no pictorial descriptions and images! 😛
The passion burgeoned through 9th and 10th grade. I believe that reading developed as my hobby because of my father. Not only is he himself a voracious reader, he owns a huge and diverse collection of many amazing novels. His genes and his library made me fall in love with reading! 🙂
Soon I realized that I loved reading fiction more than anything! And soon it became difficult for me to fall asleep without reading a novel at bedtime.
I enjoy getting lost in the intricate details and plot of a novel. When I’m reading a good novel, lost deeply in it as it slowly hypnotises and mesmerises me, I forget about my gravest worries and problems! I think books have the amazing power to calm you. They have the amazing power to make you a better person.
The World seems like a better place while reading!

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Coming to the point now. Since the day I enrolled myself into GRE coaching classes, I have had absolutely no time to indulge into reading! And I have to purposely control my urges to pick the novel I completed reading halfway. HOW DIFFICULT IT IS TO LEAVE A HALF-READ NOVEL!! It is overwhelmingly difficult, trust me!
Whenever I look at the cover of my unfinished novel, I feel as if it’s pulling me towards itself ( like a powerful magnet perhaps). I then have to forcefully stop myself by diverting my mind. I keep reminding myself – “You’ll be able to read as many novels you want once you’re finished with GRE! Prioritise! Focus!! Focus!”
😀

So I write this post today in memory of all the spectacular, awesome books and novels I’ve read. Thank you and I love you. 🙂  xoxo

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Good day!!

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Many a times , you have a feeling or experience a psychological state that you just don’t want to let go. You want to embrace it and save it forever.
Well, that is what this post is about!
I had a really good day today, after ages!! 🙂 Though this day,  of August 2nd, is coming to an end, I am not yet ready to let go of what I’m experiencing; this delightful state of bliss and contentment…..

It is surprising how tiny little things can alter our moods.
(I had even written a post about the same long time back – “Small. Is.More.Important”.)

So I have my GRE coaching classes 4 days a week; of which two are for Verbal ability, and two for Quantitative ability. I won’t be boasting when I say that I totally ROCK in the verbal ability classes! I’m not exceptionally good, but am the best in my class! Our batch has 6 students; 5 are males AND Engineering Students!! I’m the only female and the one with no Math background. All of these nerdy engineers are excellent in Math( obviously) . And as far as I’m concerned, I haven’t even studied the ‘M’ of mathematics after tenth grade! (that’s like FIVE years!!).
I used to suck at math then, and I suck at math now too.
Although I really really want to learn all the concepts and tricks used in the GRE quant section questions so as to achieve a decent score, but I find math classes utterly dreadful. I sit in one corner like a scared chicken and with an excruciatingly huge amount of courage I ask about my doubts. As all my math-geniuses-classmates find my queries silly!
( it makes my blood boil when they giggle but I don’t react as Bill Gates said – ” Be nice to nerds, you could end up working for them.” ,I don’t express my rancor.).

Anyway…. Today was the first time I came home back from math class in a good mood..!! 🙂 We covered such a topic in which I answered more frequently and accurately than my engineer classmates!! 😀  Later when we started doing extremely difficult application based questions, the situation reversed.. But who cares! I could understand everything. I felt confident!
Also.. My classmates addressed me as the “Champion” in Verbal section. (Thank you.. Thank you..).
Apart from these events, not a single bad thing happened with me today.. Got to watch an amazing episode of my favorite serial Grey’s Anatomy..


You see, how just having a good day makes you forget about your deepest insecurities, worries and despodencies.. How having a simple, decent, trouble-free, good day can keep all the undesirable NEGATIVITIES at bay!

Cheers to Good Days!!

On that note, I wish you all a wonderful day today! Bonjour!
^_^ 
Adios.

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