I’ve heard everyone say that Time heals everything. “Give it a little time”. Time.Time.TIME!
But does time really heal all wounds? I do not think time is the best healer.
I believe there is something much more important and vital than time. The
first step to the healing process (in simpler words : Moving on) is nothing but ACCEPTANCE! Yes. If you’re trying to move-on ; don’t be a fool and just sit there ‘giving time’ (as they all say). Time DOES NOT HEAL. Period.
“It has been said, ‘time heals all wounds.’ I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.”
― Rose Kennedy
I’ll repeat myself. The first step to the process of healing is Acceptance. One has to come out of the delusional realm of denial . You have to get in touch with the reality, no matter how harsh it is; no matter how unbelievable it is. Get a grip on reality (the present) and accept whatever has happened. Just doing this will make the gruesome task of ‘moving on’ 50% less difficult.
After you have accepted your reality and your fate, leave the rest to the oh-so-powerful TIME. Without acceptance even time can not help you lessen the pain.
It took me months and months to even think about deleting all the old messages. It took me quite a while to find the strength to reread those messages and just erase them all. It is very difficult to just chuck out a person from your memory. Especially when that person had become so important to you. I would be lying if I say that I managed to erase all memories. This is what happens when you become SO emotionally attached to someone. I had to save some memories i.e, the texts, the emails, the stupid never-ending conversations etc. Why? because I just had to!
For me the art of letting go has always been very difficult. I’m well aware of the fact that many people think it’s silly and crazy. They ask what is the big deal? But I am not someone who gives an explanation or justification to everyone. I don’t care what they think. They probably wont even understand if I ever tried explaining.
My case is different because whatever happened, happened so out-of-the-blue. I never got any closure. That’s the main reason which drove me crazy! For me it was like being on cloud 9 and feeling pure bliss one day , then being abandoned the very next day. It’s like getting dumped without knowing the reason; the only difference was I didn’t know I got dumped for like a
month week! And also it was not a conventional ‘relationship’. Yet, whatever it was, it was something very intense & intimate (emotionally) for me. I had gotten way too attached with the other person.
I don’t want an apology. I just need an explanation.
I started my blog with that thought [ https://catharsishungry07.wordpress.com/2012/10/12/how-can-i-forget-you-when-everything-reminds-me-of-you/ ] , and am still stuck somewhere there. The only difference is I don’t feel so pathetic & miserable anymore. And now when I read what I wrote, I feel a little weird. I mean how could I sum up SO much in just about 10 lines? It’s funny. But in my heart I know how tough it was; I remember writing my first-ever blog post with a very heavy heart.
Have similar stories/experiences? I’d love to hear!